I was having dinner with a friend recently. He and I have known each other for a number of years; every time we talk, we explore different aspects of religion. This isn’t as odd as it sounds as we met when I took my students to his place of worship to discuss his faith. He has since become one of my favourite people, and we support each other in our religious efforts even though we are of different faiths. At this dinner, he asked me if I believed in God. I was confused by this question. After knowing me for so long, how was this still a question? I said, yes! He then asked me if I really did believe in God with certainty. My answer was an even more resounding ‘Absolutely!’ I then questioned my friend, for I had never doubted his belief in God until the moment about my own beliefs. He talked about how he wanted to believe, and hoped there was a God, and that was why he lived the way he did. I then shared the story of the man who brought his son to Christ to be healed. The Bible records:

Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth. And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief (Mark 9:23-24).

As we spoke, we realised we are all at different stages in our relationship with God. Neither of us is wrong where we are, as we’re trying to move forward in our understanding of who God is and our relationship with Him.

These events have caused me to reflect on how I could respond with such certainty. There are two things in this world I am absolutely sure of and never doubt: one is that God lives and loves me; and the second is that Ruth loves me. For both, I have seen an abundance of evidence every day; and I have also felt that love. How do I know that Ruth loves me? Ruth is the person I know best in the world, even more than I know my children. We have been married for over 31 years so that I know everything about her, especially her character and Christlike attributes. That love is easy to see as we live together, and I see it in the small things and the big things that she does. There is another thing about the love that we share; we loved each other before we met. We wrote to each other for a year before we met, and I knew I loved her before we went on our first date.

Why do I share those things? Joseph Smith taught:

It is the first principle of the gospel to know for a certainty the character of God.

Just as I know Ruth loves me because I know her character and am in a relationship with her; so too, I know the Lord loves me as I have begun I know His character and live in a relationship with Him. The Saviour prayed for this knowledge and relationship with God:

And this is life eternal, that they might know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom thou hast sent (John 17:3).

Part of that abiding in a relationship with the Lord and finding that joy is by learning of him and serving him. We study his life and teachings- through this we come to know him and how we should follow him. To be disciples we are ‘learners’ or ‘followers’- in our discipleship we fully combine both roles. It is not enough just to learn we need to show what we have learned. Joseph McConkie taught:

In the context of the Bible, knowledge− in its highest spiritual sense− had little to do with the intellect but was rather a matter of the heart. The Old Testament references to a man knowing God and to a man knowing his wife− meaning conceiving a child with her− both use the same Hebrew word (yada). As a man was to leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife and become one flesh with her, so he was to leave the things of the world, cleave unto his God, and become one with him. As faithfulness in marriage was essential to the nurturing of love, so faithfulness in keeping Gospel covenants was understood to be necessary in obtaining a knowledge of God. As love of spouse was strengthened in sacrifice and devotion, so the knowledge of God was obtained in living those covenants with exactness and honour (McConkie, J. 1987: 230).

Having a knowledge of God, involves having a correct understanding of his nature and work which then leads to a correct relationship and the joy that brings. We cannot have a true relationship with someone that is built on a misunderstanding of who they are and what they do. As we live in this relationship with him, we begin to emulate his mannerisms and his actions. Love becomes part of who we are; we also view people as he would view them. We become more Christlike, and as such we live our covenants which helps us understand the atonement that much more. This is why, wherever we are, we must rededicate your lives to Jesus Christ.

I love the idea that joy is ‘a state of being and becoming.’ For someone who abides in Christ, we live in a constant relationship with Him. It is not a fleeting experience with the Godhead, rather as we abide, be and become we live in that relationship with Them. The Saviour taught:

Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me. I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing. If a man abide not in me, he is cast forth as a branch, and is withered; and men gather them, and cast them into the fire, and they are burned. If ye abide in me, and my words abide in you, ye shall ask what ye will, and it shall be done unto you. Herein is my Father glorified, that ye bear much fruit; so shall ye be my disciples. As the Father hath loved me, so have I loved you: continue ye in my love. If ye keep my commandments, ye shall abide in my love; even as I have kept my Father’s commandments, and abide in his love (John 15:4-10).

As the True Vine of which we are a branch he is the source of our strength, our joy and of our blessings. What does it mean to abide in Him? Elder Jeffrey R. Holland taught:

Christ is everything to us and we are to “abide” in Him permanently, unyieldingly, steadfastly, forever. For the fruit of the gospel to blossom and bless our lives, we must be firmly attached to Him, the Saviour of us all, and to this His Church, which bears His holy name. He is the vine that is our true source of strength and the only source of eternal life.

Our relationship with the Lord should be wholehearted and should be forever. As I abide in a relationship with my wife, Ruth, we have promised that it will be for eternity; every action and choice that we make is reflective of our covenants. That is just so with the Lord, every action that we perform should be reflective of our covenantal abiding in Him. What is important about this relationship is that only we can break the connection, he will always be true.

We come to know the character of God through a study of the scriptures, through serving Him, by abiding in Him, and recognising His had in the daily acts of living. If I consider one of the characteristics of God I am led to try and understand His love. This love is expressed in one of my favourite scriptures in Moses 7:

And it came to pass that the God of heaven looked upon the residue of the people, and he wept; and Enoch bore record of it, saying: How is it that the heavens weep, and shed forth their tears as the rain upon the mountains? And Enoch said unto the Lord: How is it that thou canst weep, seeing thou art holy, and from all eternity to all eternity?

This same question was posed to me by a friend recently. He asked: “How is it that the God who knows the end from the beginning can feel any emotion for what happens in the present?” I believe that in addition to the Lord being all knowing, he is also all loving. As such as much as he knows what will happen, it doesn’t affect him any less when it does. A very silly example is when I watch ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’- no matter how many times I have watched it, and know what will happen at then end, I still cry every time! Terryl and Fiona Givens highlight:

God is not exempt from emotional pain. Exempt? On the contrary, God’s pain is as infinite as His love. He weeps because He feels compassion. As the Lord explains to Enoch, “unto thy brethren have I said, and also given commandment, that they should love one another, and that they should choose me, their Father; but behold, they are without affection, and they hate their own blood . . . and misery shall be their doom; and the whole heavens shall weep over them, even all the workmanship of mine hands; wherefore should not the heavens weep, seeing these shall suffer?” (Terryl and Fiona Givens, God Who Weeps, Ensign Peak, 2012, 24)

The tears that he weeps is not because of the event but because of how it makes us feel. He feels our pain. As a husband, a parent, and a grandparent I have shed many tears over my loved ones. Not because harm has been caused to me, but because I can see the pain that my child is in. Because God loves us, He weeps with us. He encircles us in the arms of His love, strengthens us, and empathises with us. He is not a distant deity far removed from our lives; He is intimately involved in every aspect of our lives. The Lord is heart broken when we suffer. Through his atonement, and through his love He enables us sometimes just to put one foot in front of the other. This is made possible for through the Saviour’s life and atoning acts throughout that life:

And he shall go forth, suffering pains and afflictions and temptations of every kind; and this that the word might be fulfilled which saith he will take upon him the pains and the sicknesses of his people. And he will take upon him death, that he may loose the bands of death which bind his people; and he will take upon him their infirmities, that his bowels may be filled with mercy, according to the flesh, that he may know according to the flesh how to succour his people according to their infirmities (Alma 7:11-12).

This is what is meant by the enabling power of the atonement. It is not, and has never been, just above the forgiveness of sins. It is about drawing us into a relationship with Him that transforms us and makes us new creatures in Christ Jesus. Living in such a close, personal relationship with Him enables us to become like him. That is one of the key aspects of the atonement of Jesus Christ; he wants us to come to him but will not force us. But through the strength of His example and His love, I have been compelled to live in a relationship with Him, and by so doing I find strength and hope. We are told, in one of the Gospel’s great ironies, that:

For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it (Luke 9:24).

If we seek our own self-interest and draw away from the Lord we will be lost, even though we think we are gaining our self and our independence. Only through giving our life to the Lord and allowing his to make of us what he will, will we truly find ourselves and our full potential. Christ is the ultimate alchemist- he takes that which is base- meaning everything that we have and are and turns them into gold. He makes so much more of us than we can make of ourselves. It is only possible through living in a relationship with him.

Understanding who the Lord is takes all of our lives and then some. We live by faith, but as we believe we can come to know Him, and His qualities. He is all powerful, all knowing, patient, merciful, but most of all as I think of Him today He is all loving.

I pray that we can know all know His love as we abide in Him. For I know that God is love.